fictor: (What? [amused])
Ronan Lynch ([personal profile] fictor) wrote in [community profile] itinere2014-12-25 10:15 pm

Closed to Adam Parrish | Christmas traditions



Ronan had very specific ideas of what Christmas should be like. His home and family life hadn't ever been like one of those old black and white movies (it'd been far too weird for that), but they'd had certain traditions; traditions that fell by the wayside when Niall died. If Matthew could get both Ronan and Declan into church for midnight mass, he counted himself lucky. Ronan had thought of that several hours earlier when he'd gone to midnight mass alone. It wasn't Adam's thing, and Ronan got that. Eventually, he'd ask Adam to go to church with him, but they weren't there yet and he wasn't sure how well he'd handle mass without Matthew (and Declan) but he knew he wasn't ready to invite someone new into this particular sacred ritual. He needed to be able to mourn Declan and Matthew in a way, to accept their absence from church, at least for the time being. He'd been here in Itinere a month and a half and hadn't stepped inside the Catholic church (though he wasn't surprised they had one; this place seemed to have everything they needed materially).

After coming home from mass, he'd spoken to Adam, mostly to let him know that he wasn't going to self destruct tonight then broken open the bottle of Irish whiskey he'd dreamed a few weeks ago. He'd spent the rest of the evening in the living room sprawled on the couch remembering every detail of a particular Christmas, the best Christmas he could recall. Matthew had been four; he'd been seven and Declan nine. Niall had swept in Christmas Eve like the piece of magic that he was with a small gift for them all and promises of a visit from Father Christmas. He'd been loving, attentive and in high spirits, plying their mother with kisses and emerald jewelry. He'd carried Ronan and Matthew on his shoulders to bed, read them bedtime stories and tucked them in with promises of Christmas morn'. He and Matthew had tried to catch Santa at work but despite all of their sneaking, they'd only found Niall asleep on the couch, a bottle of Irish whiskey at hand.

It wasn't simply nostalgia that drove Ronan to mirror Niall's actions so completely that Christmas. It was driven by the knowledge that Adam had never had a Christmas like that (never mind that no one outside of the Lynchs had ever had a christmas quite like that). It was the desire to let Adam experience not only a real Christmas, but a Lynch Christmas. It was Ronan opening a door to his life, to himself, that most people would never walk through. Piggybacked on that was the nostalgia for a life that had been so much simpler, a homesickness for home.

In any case, when Adam awoke Christmas morning (regardless of where he'd chosen to fall asleep given that Ronan had fallen asleep passed out on the couch downstairs) he would wake to a scene much like this where there had been no Christmas tree or presents. All of the presents have Adam's name on them. Among those presents were such things as sweaters, fingerless gloves for working, a space heater that ran on dream energy and glowed bright blue instead of orange, remote helicopters, a acoustic guitar and a tin of shortbread cookies (the cookies inexplicably warm). Chugging around the entire living area and all the presents is a model train. Chainsaw is busily picking at a pile of ribbons that might've once belonged to a present or perhaps they were simply dreamed to keep Chainsaw busy as she doesn't seem to be able to untangle them regardless of how long she works on them. In the kitchen he would find Ronan practically giddy (for Ronan) pouring a mug of hot chocolate from a carafe full of hot chocolate (and let's be honest, it's probably endless). There was also spread on the counter top (all piping hot) a full Irish breakfast. If he's got a hangover (he does), he's not showing it. He was mildly worried about Adam having dream hangover, but the ley lines are healthy right now, unbroken and strong. Besides, Ronan thought this was worth it. Without, comment he pushed a bottle of aspirin at Adam along with a small glass of juice.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-03 12:08 am (UTC)(link)
What didn't seem like a big deal to Ronan lynch was a huge deal to Adam Parrish. That room had saved Adam even more than choosing Ronan over his dad that night had saved him. It had taken Adam a longer time to realize the gift of choosing Ronan over his father than it had been for him to realize the gift of the room at St. Agnes. Some gifts were more obvious than others. Some were easier to accept.

Right now Adam had no idea what to do with all these presents. So he tore himself away from them to go over to the food. He starts loading up a plate. "You were busy last night. You never came to bed.'

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-06 08:11 pm (UTC)(link)
There was most definitely volumes left unsaid there after the comment about mass. But the comment in and of itself caused Adam to pause and look to Ronan. He might have offered to go to mass with Ronan, but in Adam's mind the event was something so personal to Ronan that he would feel like he was infringing. And should someone who wasn't sure he believed in God even be at mass? Would it be a mockery to what Ronan believed? On top of that Adam often felt like if there was a God, Adam must have done something wrong to be so overlooked by Him.

Adam turns back to the food and then answers Ronan. "Just a little headache." It was a big headache. But Adam wouldn't say that and ruin what Ronan had done for him. No one had ever done anything like this for him. Ronan was accumulating an ever-growing list of things he surprised Adam with.

With a full plate of food, Adam moves to sit on the couch next to Ronan. He sets the plate on his lap and looks over at his boyfriend. "No one's ever surprised me as much as you. No one."

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-08 08:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Adam dug into the breakfast. If Ronan had caused his headache by dreaming all of this up, he was at least going to enjoy it. And it was good, delicious, probably more food that either of them could ever eat in one sitting, but delicious nonetheless. Adam wouldn't eat everything on his plate either. Some habits were hard to break and Adam had just never had enough food. His stomach, after years of going without, years of having just barely enough, had never adjusted to having enough or more than enough.

At one moment when there was no food in his mouth, Adam nods in the direction of the tree. "Are there presents for you under there?" He asks.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-09 08:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Opening presents would be a new and strange experience for him. But it would be made awkward if he were the only one doing it. He knew that sometimes Ronan couldn't control what he dreamed to a T. So it made sense that Ronan wouldn't know exactly what was under the tree. It was still kind of magical to Adam, even if he did feel a little bad that he hadn't gotten Ronan anything.

Adam took another bite of food and looked sideways to his boyfriend as he chewed and swallowed it down. "I kept waking up last night." It was his way of saying that he hadn't slept well without Ronan there, that he had become accustomed to Ronan being there, that he had missed him.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-10 10:08 pm (UTC)(link)
"So you did all of this on purpose." It's said as a statement but meant as a question. Sometimes Ronan dreamed things unintentionally. All of this seemed to be done with full intent and purpose. There was a difference between the two. And Adam wanted to know. It was just hard to believe that Ronan had dreamed all of this specifically, including presents under the tree with the name 'Adam' on the tag. It was so sweet, like hand cream kind of sweet, although Adam would never say as much aloud though. He would show his thanks in other ways, like he had with the cream, by simply using it.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-14 09:41 pm (UTC)(link)
At that urging, Adam hesitated. He looked over to the tree with a bit of trepidation. Not that the tree with all it's decoration and gifts was something ominous and scary. This was just something he had never done before, like the roller coaster and the ferris wheel, like snow sledding and wanting to kiss Ronan Lynch. Adam had always been this way, analyzing anything and everything very near to death before jumping in.

Finally, he set his barely touched plate aside and moved back to the tree. He knelt next to it, hands on his thighs as he studied what of the gifts he could see. "Just... whichever one? Does it matter?"

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-18 03:58 pm (UTC)(link)
For a moment, after Ronan has moved down to sit next to him and explained how to pick which present to open to him, Adam looks at him like he's crazy. It's just a moment where he's not sure whether Ronan is poking fun at him or whether he's telling him in all sincerity that he should actually do that. Really it could go either way.

But finally, Adam picks up a present and holds it in his hands, shaking it a bit so as not to jostle anything too much. He looks questioningly to Ronan to see if that was enough.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-19 08:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Ronan is obviously much better at this picking a present. He does it with such showiness that Adam has to be amused at the sight of it. He dips his head, hiding a smile before it can actually turn into a smile. Adam Parrish rarely smiled. And on the rare occasion that he did smile he had a very good reason to do so.

"Okay." He says without looking up. This is where Adam turns the package this way and that, finding the edges of the ribbon to work that off without snapping it. Once that's done, he finds the side and starts carefully working at the tape. It's a slow process. But he's obviously trying to preserve the wrapping paper.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-21 04:26 pm (UTC)(link)
"Hey." Adam calls out as Chainsaw snatches the ribbon he had so carefully removed. He watches her ascent and his lips twist sardonically for a moment as he watches her play with it. Then it's back to the present and carefully working the tape from the paper to preserve the wrapping paper.

When Ronan teases him, Adam looks between him and the wrapping paper again. "You don't wanna - ?" He shakes his head. Of course Ronan didn't care about reusing the paper. Ronan wanted him to destroy it, rip into it and get to the present.

It took Adam a few moments to tell himself that that was okay to do. The first tiny rip got another tiny smile from him. Then Adam started ripping the rest of the paper away to get to the box inside.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-22 07:20 pm (UTC)(link)
"Really?" And here's that wonder again, over whether Ronan is messing with him or not. But the more he thought about it, this was definitely the way Ronan would do Christmas. Norman Rockwell was too tame and wholesome for Ronan. The thought made him almost smile. Christmas would and should be chaotic and messy and wild with Ronan.

Adam presses his lips together to stop any smile from actually forming. Then he wads up the paper and throws it into the fire place. "I think you just like fire." He says.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-24 04:56 pm (UTC)(link)
And Adam could be the exact opposite of that. He was a mess in his own right, make no mistake. But he preferred the outside, at least, to be neat and tidy. As much as they could be for a kid who had never had the money to buy nice things.

But speaking of nice things, when Adam opens the box and finds the sweater, probably the nicest item of clothing that had ever been theoretically his, he just stares at it. He holds it up and looks at it like it's something he doesn't know what to do with. Is it his? Really? Had Ronan really intended to gift this to him? Could he accept something so nice?

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-26 10:46 pm (UTC)(link)
He might have told Ronan to quit being so bossy. He might have told Ronan to shut up. He might have told Ronan a lot of things. But it was Christmas and Ronan had put this all together for them. He was so near the line between pride and ungrateful and he didn't want to cross that line. He wanted Ronan to know that he did appreciate all of this even if it was hard for him.

So finally, he pulls the sweater on, his hair, always messy, does that static thing where it stands on end as he looks questioningly to Ronan. "It fits."

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-01-30 06:56 pm (UTC)(link)
"Thank you." Adam said, looking down to the sweater and smoothing his hands down over it, then adjusting the collar. The sweater even smelled new. He'd never had new things before, much less something so nice. And he'd never had to be so gracious before either because he usually didn't accept things from people. "I like it." He says, looking back up to Ronan.

After a moment, he reached for another present with his name on it. He nods at the remote control helicopter in Ronan's hands. "You know Chainsaw is gonna attack that, right?"

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-02-03 10:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Adam laughs then, only it doesn't sound like a laugh and it doesn't show on his lips. It's there in his eyes and it comes out as just a few heavy exhales of breath. Of course Ronan didn't expect the helicopter to last. He wanted to destroy it. That was Ronan. And Adam expected no different, he supposed.

He looks back down into his lap and starts unwrapping another gift. "Am I your boyfriend?" He asks, the question falling out of his mouth before he can stop it. He looks up immediately to judge Ronan's reaction to the term.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-02-06 11:17 pm (UTC)(link)
That moment of stunned silence from Ronan seems like so much more than a moment to him. It feels as if it stretches out for an eternity as Adam waits. He spends part of that eternity watching Ronan. Then when he realizes that he's watching Ronan, and that Ronan is watching him watch him, he looks quickly away. Adam has never been able to withstand Ronan's staring at him for long. Part of that is that he naturally cows under pressure. Part of it is that Ronan is always so intense, anyone would eventually buckle.

When he finally answers, Adam looks back up to catch that grin on Ronan's lips. The words sound like they're coming at him through a tunnel until Ronan says he's never had a boyfriend before. There's something thrilling in the idea that he would be Ronan Lynch's first boyfriend. There's something terrifying in hoping that he would be Ronan Lynch's last and only boyfriend. Adam Parrish isn't accustomed to hoping for anything.

He pulls his lip through his teeth while also pressing them together thoughtfully. And he nods. "Me either. I mean... either... not a boyfriend or a girlfriend." He trips over his words. He seems to think about that for another moment before nodding in agreement and looking back down to his present. "Cool." Merry Christmas, Ronan. You just got Adam to agree to be your boyfriend in a roundabout way.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-02-18 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
With the boyfriend thing settled (mostly) Adam tries not to look too excited or giddy about it. Giddiness is not something that Adam likes to feel because he has little experience with it and has no idea what to do with it. But there's no denying the excitement inside that he's trying so hard not to let show even though it threatens to burst out and make a mess over this perfect little scene Ronan has put together for them.

Ronan Lynch is his boyfriend. And nothing has broken or exploded. The world is still turning on its axis. Adam Parrish is desirable.

The new gift, thankfully, gives him something to focus on besides the party going on inside of him. He starts to carefully work at the wrapping. But then after a glance up to Ronan, he rips through the ribbon and the paper. In the box inside, Adam findes the bracelet and picks it out. His head tilts to the side as he looks over the numbers and the letters.

There is no mistaking those numbers for anything else but what they are. They were numbers that every single one of them were intimate with. "Cabeswater." It was the most amazing thing. The bracelet was perfect. The A P L threw him off because of the L. He felt weird assuming that the L was for Lynch. And why was it more worn than the other two. He looked up to Ronan curiously. "I love this." No matter what, he loved it. It was suddenly the most precious thing he owned.

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-02-23 10:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Ronan pulls him into a kiss and this act is still new enough that Adam feels a lurch of his heart in his chest and just a step behind the kiss as he returns it. A part of him wishes he were a better kisser. A part of him hopes that he never gets entirely used to kissing Ronan Lynch. His boyfriend. Officially. Even that thought makes his chest feel tight with emotion that he isn't ready to explore.

But kissing. Kissing is something he can do.

Adam melts into it. Then speaks against Ronan's lips. "I think I have something at the shop..." He kisses him again. "To fix the L."

[personal profile] adamparrish 2015-03-02 08:20 pm (UTC)(link)
"It's not messed up." Adam almost sounded defensive about that even as the words spilled into another kiss that he gave to Ronan. It was getting harder and harder not to kiss Ronan every single time he wanted to, much less when Ronan initiated a kiss. So Adam had to kiss him now like he had to breathe in and out.

He looks into Ronan's eyes just briefly before he shakes his head and looks down. "You just knew how much I like to fix things. Will you put it on me?"