itinere | Mingle Event

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Mingle Event

The County Fair has come to Itinere! It just magically appeared overnight. Such fun, right? Absolutely. Here, you'll find every rickety ride you can think of from ferris wheels, water rides, pendulum rides and roller coasters to the horrifying Drop Tower ride, a reverse bungee experience and tilt-a-whirl. Pretty much if you can dream an amusement ride, it's here. Don't even think about going hungry. They fry everything at this event. And of course there are the old staples of any Fair, funnel cakes, corn dogs and shaved ice in every flavor. Careful, you just might get pulled into a massive tent to judge anything from pies to barbecue to pickles to jams. Oh, but it isn't all food. You might get pulled into a tent to judge livestock. Sheep, cattle, pigs and llamas are the name of the game. Who has the best of the best? Did anyone say horse races? Feel free to bet at the makeshift track where horses will be racing all day! The promenade has several live bands cycling through on and off all day. Grab someone and dance before you, yourself get pulled into a two-step.

Everything isn't entirely on the up and up though. Did that sheep just whisper to you? What is it telling you to do? Is that paint on that clowns face or is that just his face? No smile should be naturally that large. In the hall of mirrors, you might not see yourself looking back at you. One of the mirrors might even be empty. Anyone who goes through the tunnel of love will feel compelled to kiss no matter who they're with. The acrobats do death defying acts that seem far too unreal. And the animals in their cages, the lions and the panthers... they look at you with a sentient, knowing eye that would give anyone the heebie-jeebies. The music in the promenade might force you to dance, with or without a partner. The fortune tellers know far too much about you and your life past, present and future.

But hey! It's a Fair! Everyone loves a Fair, don't they? Have fun while the fun lasts!

ooc: This is a very stereotypical fair. Feel free to create your own adventures, good or bad. Want to play with some of the not quite right stuff in the Fair? Have at it! Basically, create your own muses storyline here, let your imagination run wild, mingle, and have fun! Want to plot with others? Comment to THIS post!

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"You are you. The one and only, unicus, Ronan Lynch." Adam answers with as much flare as Adam ever said anything. Which isn't a lot. But his teasing is evident in his tone. Teasing even with as much truth was in the statement. There wasn't and would never be another Ronan Lynch in the world.

Ronan grabs his hand from the bar and Adam looks at him like he isn't so sure that they won't fall out as they still rise up and up. He thinks about holding onto Ronan's hand, and then thinks about how cliche it would probably be in a ferris wheel, as Ronan had said. So he doesn't. Ronan would mock cliche, as he rightly should.

"You keep rocking us and I'm not sure this bar is enough to keep us in." He says instead, arguing for arguing's sake. "I mean look. I could slide right through this thing. How do they let kids on this ride?"

On the whole, that's pretty flair-riffic and flattering. It has Ronan smirking, obviously pleased. Of course, it's the teasing tone as much as anything that pleases him. "The day dad was born back in Ireland, there was an earthquake. He used to say that was God breaking the mold." He shook his head a little. "Declan is just like him though." Which is funny because Ronan had worshipped Niall and he couldn't be in the same room with Declan. "Declan says I'm just like Dad." They're both right. They're different sides of Niall.

Ronan slides his hand to Adam's wrist, thumb pressed against the fluttering pulse point before he lets go. Yeah, holding hands in the ferris wheel would be cliched. Ronan would probably mock it. At the same time, Ronan would be relieved that Adam is taking a step toward him. They'd been in a holding pattern since that kiss. Pushing Adam away or destroying the friendship they had isn't something Ronan is interested in. He'd rather be stuck in this holding pattern, or have clear cut lines drawn about their relationship, lines that made it clear they were just friends than destroy their friendship.

Ronan smirks at that, purposefully rocking the seat. "We're not going to fall out. We're eighteen, not six and if you slide out, I hope you can hang onto the edge for a while."

They haven't even reached the apex of the ferris wheel yet.

Every single time that Ronan decided to share something about himself it surprised Adam. He'd never had friends like Gansey, Noah or Ronan. And it felt like Ronan was so closed off in the beginning. So was Adam, embarrassed of his circumstances as he had been. That they'd come so far with each other felt nothing short of miraculous. It seemed especially miraculous when the things that Ronan shared had to do with his past and his family, particularly his father.

Adam loved to hear tales of Ronan and his father. It seemed the sort of relationship between a father and son as it should be, not at all like what Adam had been saddled with.

"If you're just like your dad, and if there's a God, then He broke the mold with you too." It sort of delighted him to think that he might be knowing Niall Lynch through Ronan because they were so much alike.

The way Ronan held his wrist for even those few seconds was nice. He still went back and forth over whether they should hold hands. He almost reached out for the bar again, but then just held onto his notebook in his lap. "Maybe if you would stop shaking the car then no one would have to hang onto the edge... which is opposite of reassuring, by the way."

He can't believe this thing still has higher to go. The people look so small below.

He didn't share things easily because that required trust, particularly when he shared bits and pieces of his father. Ronan knew that Niall hadn't been perfect, but he'd still worshipped his father. In some ways, even more so now that he knew Niall wasn't perfect. His relationship with his father had been good. His father loved him and Ronan had never doubted that.

"There's a God, Parrish." As for whether or not he broke the mold when Ronan was born, he's not sure. "He used to say that when I was born all the rivers dried up and the cows in Rockingham County wept blood. My mom argued that the trees grew flowers and the Henrietta ravens laughed."

HIs childhood had been different from anyone and everyone's that he knew, but he had been loved. Maybe that's why he'd fallen apart when Niall had been murdered, when his mother had become a sleeping thing rather than a dream thing.

Eventually it'll be something that Ronan does for more than a few seconds. He likes to feel Adam's pulse flutter under his fingertips, likes the way that it picks up ever so slightly at his touch. At Adam's words, a smirk props up one corner of his mouth. He purposely rocks the car again. "Don't worry, Parrish. I won't let you fall."

If it's at all comforting, they're close to the top. In fact, the next time the ferris wheel jerks to a stop, they're sitting right at the center of it.

There was that infallible belief again. Adam just couldn't understand how Ronan could believe in something he had never seen solid proof of like that. At least with Glendower there had been event after event that proved their quest was real and necessary. But God... that was a more difficult animal to tackle. Adam didn't begrudge Ronan his beliefs though. He respected them. Envied them even. But if there really was a God, it felt as if He had overlooked the Parrish household for Adam's entire life. And if God had thought to put Ronan in his life because he needed him, He was seventeen years late to save him from being bruised and scarred.

Again, he liked hearing about Ronan's parents, his life from before and how he spoke about it. He wondered how long it would last though. And he didn't know how to keep it going. In normal conversation, someone would respond with some equally revealing and amusing anecdote about their own parents. 'I wish you'd never been born' 'You're a worthless piece of shit' and 'I let you live here so I own you, boy' weren't nearly so amusing. Although they were very revealing in a way that would bring the conversation to a halt.

"It sounds like they knew." Adam finally says, his tone light to keep from revealing the dark path his thoughts had taken. "I mean, about both sides of you." Yes, he just called Ronan out on having a light and a dark side, a hard and a soft side. But that was what he got from both of those differing statements from his parents.

Maybe it was worse, Adam thought, to have had the love of one's parents and to have lost it, rather than to never have had it at all.

Ronan rocks the car again and Adam scrambles to reach for something, dropping his pencil and pad in the process. The pad falls to the bottom of the car and the pencil, well it rolls and then just keeps on falling all the way down to the ground below. Adam forgets to grab onto something in order to save the notebook. He stomps on it with his boot to stop it from sliding off and reaches down for it. He slips the notebook under his thigh in the seat to hold it in place.

"You owe me a pencil." He would have lamented this further, but now they're at the very top. Adam looks around. They're so high up above the ground. It reminded him of being in Helen's helicopter. Only quieter. More peaceful. And with someone who actually wanted to be with him. "I like the world a lot better from up here." He said thoughtfully.

Maybe it had something to do with the fact that church and God had wrought a miracle every single Sunday for as long as Ronan could remember. On Sundays, the Lynchs went to mass. Niall always dragged himself home in time for it. He and Declan hadn't fought. On it's own, that had been no small miracle, coupled with Niall's presence that was a major miracle in Ronan's eyes. As for Adam's situation, Ronan couldn't explain the lack of God's hand in it. Maybe Ronan wasn't meant to save Adam the bruising and scarring. Maybe he was just meant to save Adam. They'd both had to become the people they are before that could happen. Or maybe it wasn't that fateful. Maybe Ronan was just a bigger asshole than Adam's father and had happened to come along then.

Ronan knew that Adam wouldn't have any parent stories to recipocate. He wasn't looking for that. He was just talking. He didn't require Adam to tell him anything about his parents, but if he wanted to, he'd listen.

He snorted at the way Adam 'called him out'. He wouldn't deny it because he knew Adam had seen that side of him, and he didn't want to deny it. He wanted Adam to know that side of him. He didn't want Adam to buy into the 'worst thing in Henrietta' image that Ronan cultivated. "Yeah, the flowers all withered and died two seconds later. The ravens probably kept laughing though." That part had always rang true to Ronan.

Ronan couldn't help but chortle at the way Adam scrambles. He reached out and grabbed Adam's arm. "I told you I wouldn't let you fall, Parrish." He smirked a little. "I'll dream you a crate." Because one of Chainsaw's favorite things to chew up were pencils. He'd need a crate to replace them all and fuck going to the store like a normal person and buying a crate of pencils.

For a few moments, Ronan was silent, actually taking a moment to look at the town from this height. "It looks like Gansey's cereal box town, but not so shitty."

And with that one mention, he missed Gansey immensely, so much so that it stole his breath and left him struggling to remember how to exist. Finally, he drew a sharp breath and exhaled. His body went taunt with anger, with bitterness and fear repressed. He should have kept Gansey out of this moment.

Either way. There had been a time when Adam believed that he was an army of one, a sole survivor, an unknowable thing. He had learned to let people in. He had learned to let Ronan in. And while Ronan had faith in God, Adam had learned to have faith in Ronan. Something that was a huge step for him.

"That's weird, I've never seen flowers wither around you." He answered wryly, still teasing Ronan. He added with some honestly a moment later : "That raven thing though, spot on."

Adam looked at Ronan like he was insane. But truthfully, he knew that Ronan could indeed dream him a whole crate of pencils. Maybe they would need a crate's worth. "Dream me a crate of pencils." Which sounded a little more suggestive for a crate of pencils with Ronan's hand on his arm.

But then Ronan mentioned Gansey. Adam could feel the mood change between them immediately as they both looked over the edge and thought of Gansey with his box house. Without thinking, and without words, Adam reached up to his arm for Ronan's hand and held that hand in between both of his. No, Ronan should have kept Gansey out of the moment. But it also gave Adam something to think about so that he didn't over-think this one very simple thing.

Well, there were worse things that Adam could have faith in. Despite first impressions, surface impression, Ronan was reliable in a way that few people were. Once his loyalty was earned, it could be counted on regardless of all other things.

"Haven't ever seen them bloom around me either, have you?" Ronan smirked. It wasn't entirely true. He could convince flowers in Cabeswater to bloom for him, but that was an entirely different story. He nodded a little at the raven thing. That part had always rang true for Ronan, more so than cows weeping blood.

"I'll get right on that," Ronan drawled, managing to sound more suggestive and wicked than pencils ought to be. There was a hint of Niall's Irish accent there, mixed with his own Henrietta drawl. He was incredibly aware of his hand on Adam's arm, his eyes flickered to it as he finished his sentence, just before they met Adam's eyes again.

Ronan didn't mock Adam for holding his hand that way, nor did he think it cliched in the moment. He wasn't even thinking about it in a romantic way right now. Instead, he was grateful that Adam was there to anchor him. He was grateful that he had something to keep him from spinning out of control. He squeezed Adam's hand tightly, breathing through that crippling anger and sense of loss that permeated him. He closed his eyes, more vulnerable than Adam had probably ever seen him because he was bereft of anything to hit or burn or drink. He had to actually cope with these feelings, at least until they reached the ground.

Adam had never seen flowers, or much of anything, bloom around Ronan, no. Truth be told, Adam didn't have much experience with flowers at all. But he had laid with Ronan in the grass, Summertime green grass warm with the sun and damp from recent rain that hadn't turned yellow and dead with his touch. He could hardly believe that flowers would be any different than that.

How Ronan Lynch could make a box of pencils sound so suggestive and wicked was beyond Adam. But he had successfully done it. So that Adam was looking at him with a stunned expression that hinted at lust. Pencils. Adam wanted pencils. Now. Not now. Someday. He told himself it was because he'd never thought anyone would want to dream him anything, let alone a whole crate of something. Deep down, he knew that it was because it was Ronan doing the dreaming.

Holding Ronan's hand in both of his, Adam watched him again in profile. This was made all the more easier as Ronan closed his eyes. Ronan's vulnerability was shocking to see... and beautiful. It was like looking at a lion up close and personal, knowing that at any minute the calm could go away and you could be dead of an attack. Adam watched him. Then, bolstered by Ronan's closed eyes, Adam leaned over to gently kiss at the corner of his lips. His heart pounded in his chest with the act, so bold on his part and possibly ill timed given the tenor of the moment and Ronan's vulnerability and the aforementioned cliche and the public nature of it. But up this high, who would see?

It was hyperbole. Ronan didn't think flowers were really going to wilt around him, nor did he think they'd bloom around him. At least not anywhere except Cabeswater. However, most people wouldn't be surprised to see flowers wilt around Ronan. He had that sort of reputation. Adam, clearly, was not most people.

It probably had a good deal to with the fact that, for Adam, he was Ronan. Everyone else was likely to think he made them sound dangerous or lethal. See the above disclaimer about Adam. Then again, Ronan wouldn't try to make pencils sound suggestive to anyone that wasn't Adam. While Adam wore an expression akin to lust, Ronan wore one more akin to triumphant because he recognized that look on Adam's face. He wore lust under his triumphant expression like a second skin. If Adam would let him, Ronan would dream him a whole world of impossible things.

There were only two living people in the world that Ronan would allow to see him vulnerable like this. Adam was one of them. Vulnerability could be a weapon in other people's hands and Ronan wasn't going to hand anyone a weapon to use against him, but he knew that Adam wouldn't ever use it like that. The description was an accurate one. Ronan could turn on a dime and strike someone down, but he wouldn't, not with Adam. That's what this comfort was about, knowing that he could be vulnerable in front of Adam. He still didn't like being vulnerable, but even the invincible Ronan Lynch had moments where he couldn't control his emotions, couldn't funnel them into anger or bitterness, or something else he was more comfortable with. If they'd been privy to anyone else's eyes, Ronan would have pulled anger around him like a coat. He would have hit something or screamed; he would have pushed everyone away.

Whatever fears Adam might have had were probably fairly quickly put to rest. There was only the slightest hesitation on Ronan's part when Adam pressed the kiss against the corner of his mouth. No, it probably wasn't the best time and yes, it was cliched as hell, but it was also something else to focus on, something that Ronan had been thinking about since before that kiss in the barns, but almost obsessively since that kiss in the barns. He twists, turning into the kiss, deepening it, making it a full blown kiss rather than a glance off the corner of his mouth. He poured all the pain and homesickness, all his anger at that, all his desire into that kiss, letting it distract him. If it weren't for the rock of the chair they sat in, he would forget entirely where they were. His free hand came around to rest at the nape of Adam's neck, pulling him into the kiss, willing him to pour himself into it the way that Ronan poured himself into it.

They could talk about cliched later and Ronan could give a damn about the public. He'd never cared what anyone else thought and he wouldn't in this case either. That attitude was only intensified by the fact that he didn't know a single person here besides Adam.

That hesitation lasted only a few seconds, if that. Adam had assumed that he might catch Ronan off guard. So while there was still that underlying anxiousness in regards to how Ronan might receive him, the hesitation had been expected. And if those few seconds were the worst that happened, then he would take it. Because his imagination, as great as it was, could have come up with any number of ways that Ronan could have reacted and would have upset him horribly.

Ronan was kissing him. They were a cliche. And still, Ronan was kissing him.

This was their second kiss. And Adam floundered briefly when the other deepened the kiss and made it into something far more substantial than Adam had initially been capable of. In fact, it was far more substantial than Adam could even imagine himself ever being capable of. The crux was this: once Ronan took something to a certain level, Adam could. This could only happen if he kept himself from over-thinking it. But this was why Ronan was good for him. Ronan pushed him outside of that confining box he tended to put himself in. Kissing was just one of the ways he did this.

For a few seconds, Adam's kiss is still soft, feather light like it's something he wants but is still so very unsure of it. And then that hand cups the back of his neck, Ronan asks for more without using a single word, and Adam follows where Ronan takes it. He quits thinking for a precious few moments. At least he doesn't think beyond Ronan, kissing, a crate full of pencils just for him. His lips part and he presses into the kiss, one hand reaching up to grab at Ronan's wrist again, over those bracelets Ronan always wears, over the scars, it seems one of the most intimate places to touch to Adam, given how few get to touch.

It really was only because he'd been caught off guard, because he'd been lost in his own thoughts, that until the kiss hadn't had anything to do with Adam or kissing. In some ways, Adam's version of Ronan was much scarier than the actual Ronan. He wouldn't ever be a teddy bear, but with Adam his center was softer. Besides, he wanted this so much, wanted Adam so much, he wasn't going to push Adam away. He wasn't going to give Adam the impression that he didn't want him when nothing could be further from the truth. He had an idea about Blue's rejection, even if he didn't know the details, he'd watched Adam carefully. He wouldn't do that to him.

Yeah, they were a cliche. They were on the ferris wheel making out like every other stupid teenage couple at this fair, and Ronan could care less right now.

Perhaps Ronan should have pulled away when Adam floundered. He wasn't good at backing out of a situation. He tended to dive in head first. That was what he was doing right now. That was a fitting description considering that Ronan took things from a dream and made them real, made them substantial. However, Ronan thought Adam was capable of more than he imagined. Ronan was content to lead, but there was that fear in the back of his mind that Adam was only following for the sake of following rather than because he wanted to follow. However, for the moment, when they were just kissing, Ronan trusted Adam to say stop when it was time to stop, he trusted Adam to stop him and that it wouldn't break things, wouldn't break them, wouldn't break whatever this was that they had.

Soft and feather light was okay. It was perfect. Ronan didn't expect Adam to know what this was about, to know what he wanted right now. He'd taken a long while to come to terms with his sexuality despite knowing what it was for most of his life. He wouldn't begrudge Adam taking the time to come to terms with his, not as long as they maintained their friendship through it. Words had never been Ronan's strong suit. His emotions had always been spoken in actions. This was just one more example of that. When Adam grabbed his wrist, Ronan took that as reassurance that this was okay. He pressed closer, shifting so that his knee pressed against Adam's thigh. The bar that had locked down over their laps kept Ronan from getting as close as he wanted.

"Fuck" he murmured against Adam's mouth. He nipped at Adam's bottom lip, sucking on it hard.

Ronan got his wish, because Adam completely forgot that they were on a ferris wheel. He forgot that people might or could not see them. He forgot that he probably shouldn't be doing this. Or maybe he should. No, all confusion was gone the moment Ronan kissed him like this. How Ronan did it, Adam didn't know. And he felt clumsy in his attempts to mimic the way Ronan kissed him with the other. It felt like Ronan's kiss was the actual event, and Adam's merely it's shadow. That wasn't to say it was wrong or right. That wasn't to say it was good or bad. Everything real cast a shadow. And this kiss was very, very real.

Adam could feel Ronan so close to him, no space between them in the car of the wheel, but still Adam wanted him closer. It was a manner of desire that Adam had never felt before. It shocked him to feel it as it started from somewhere deep inside and spread from the inside out. It surprised him so much that he was thankful when Ronan paused to breathe...

To curse...

That curse felt like a secret promise to Adam. He leaned in as Ronan's teeth scraped against his lip and sucked. He had never, ever been kissed like that. He wanted it to happen again so that he could make sure it had happened at all. But he didn't know how to ask for it, how to make it happen. So he did the same thing to Ronan that the other had just done to him. His own teeth scraped over the fleshy bottom lip that had just been kissing him, and he sucked hard. Only afterward, his tongue slid a light caress over the skin, soothing even as he tried to get more of Ronan's attentions. Even in action he was at war with himself.

He'd be glad to know that he could chase away any confusion that Adam had, because that was what he wanted more than anything: for Adam to be certain. If Adam decided that this wasn't what he wanted, Ronan could (and would) live with that. Of course, he hoped that the certainty would lean in his favor. Every real thing needed a shadow and if that was what Adam was, then that's what Ronan wanted him to be, but he definitely didn't find Adam's attempts at kissing him clumsy. Adam's kisses made him want more, made him feel like he needed more the way that he needed air.

If it weren't for the bar locked over their legs, Ronan would be on top of Adam, knee pressed between his legs. His hands would be beneath his shirt. It would be very clear how much Ronan wanted Adam right now (always).

Well, it was Ronan.

His breath came fast and heavy against Adam's mouth and a groan, low and throaty rumbled from his mouth when Adam scraped his teeth against his lip and sucked on it. That was more than enough encouragement, more than enough of a request. He'd scarcely caught his breath with the tip of Adam's tongue glided over his bottom lip and he closed all the distance between them, his mouth colliding against Adam's, his tongue begging entrance to his mouth.

It was so like them in every way. Ronan was always vocal, in everything. If Ronan felt something everyone knew it. Those sounds Ronan made sliced through him in the most intimate of ways. Ronan wanted the kiss. Adam was doing good enough to make Ronan make a sound like that. Adam, on the other hand, was silent in everything. The only sounds he made in the kiss were a quick gasp of air here and there. This kiss was everything that they were.

Adam's lips parted, giving Ronan what he wanted at the slightest provocation. It was so easy right now in this moment to give in to what he wanted for himself and to give Ronan what he wanted. Adam let him in and they kissed each other, warm and needy for the moment.

Needy, until the car slid to a stop and the man lifted the bar in front of it.

"Ride's over lovebirds, unless you wanna ride again."

Adam couldn't help the way he flushed pink. He couldn't help the way he pulled away and scrambled to put his notebook away into his bag and to get away from the Ferris Wheel. He only paused and looked back when he was several yards away to make sure Ronan was with him. "I'm sorry."

And Ronan could usually make noises of some sort. Of course, they were generally swears or growls, grumbles, very rarely groans. Yes, Ronan wanted the kiss. Ronan wanted Adam. He wanted to be closer, he wanted more even if he wasn't sure what more entailed.

What Ronan really wanted was to punch the man running the ride. His hands balled into fists at his sides. He glared at the man, bowing up as he walked past him, but he walked past him because Adam was already ahead of him. He caught up with Adam, shooting a confused sort of glare at his apology.

"The fuck for?" His tone was defensive and harsh, certain that what Adam was sorry for was kissing him, that now that they were on the ground Adam didn't want Ronan.

"You were upset and I..." Adam had kissed him. Adam had kissed Ronan Lynch. Not only that, but he had initiated the kiss. It almost felt like he had used the moment when Ronan's guard was down, when Ronan was upset, to his own advantage to do what he had wanted to do more and more since that first kiss at the Barns in Ronan's dad's office.

He felt like an ass. And he was embarrassed by the man's comment, by the cliche of what he had done. He was waiting for Ronan to ride him for it, waiting for Ronan to make fun of him for it. And he didn't know how he would react to either.

So instead, he talked about something else. "I miss them too, okay?"

"Yeah, I noticed," Ronan finished. His eyes narrowed as he caught up to Adam, watching him as they walked. He was trying to figure out what the hell was going on with Adam. In some ways, he had taken advantage of Ronan's guard being down, but what Adam didn't realize yet was that Ronan would have kissed him back regardless of whether his guard had been down or not.

"I'm not pissed. Just don't fuckin' tell anyone you kissed me on the ferris wheel. Make it the god dam roller coaster, or something." Honestly, that was it. That was all the riding he was going to get. "Hell, we could do it on the roller coaster and you wouldn't have to lie."

There you go, but he wasn't expecting Adam to agree. He was joking with him, trying to make him realize that he wasn't angry, that he didn't care.

When he mentions 'them' Ronan sobers again, looking down at the grass, nodding a little. "Yeah. That the only reason behind it?" He bites the inside of his cheek hard, rare insecurities bursting out in what might look like anger to someone who didn't know Ronan. "I'm not Blue, and missing her won't change that."

Figuratively, of course.

Ronan said he wasn't pissed. But strangely enough, it was harder for Adam to tell the difference between pissed off Ronan and everyday Ronan when Adam himself was worked up about something too. So actually hearing Ronan say that he wasn't pissed off went a long way with him.

Adam relaxed a bit, smirking when Ronan mentioned the ferris wheel, the roller coaster. He really didn't mind telling people it was on a roller coaster. But in his mind, Adam would never forget that the first time he had initiated a kiss with Ronan, it had been on a ferris wheel. And he would never forget how that kiss had felt up there in that car until they had quite literally come back down to earth and been so rudely interrupted by the fair worker.

He flushed at the memory of being called 'lovebirds'. Then he looked up at Ronan and shook his head. "You can't kiss on a roller coaster, can you? It moves too fast and it's all... unstable." And terrifying considering the way people screamed on it.

And then Ronan asked if the only reason he had kissed him was because of those who weren't here. Adam started to shake his head, the word 'no' on his lips until Ronan added the last bit about Blue. Everything in him went hard and cold and detached. Was that really what Ronan thought about his kiss? Was that really what Ronan though Adam wanted?

"Fuck you, Ronan." He said, the words harsh and angry before he turned to walk away.

Yeah, well there was a reason he said that he wasn't pissed. It was important to him that Adam know he wasn't pissed over this, over the kiss regardless of how cliched it had been.

Oh, Ronan wouldn't forget it either. It was a big step for Adam, which was why it was so important that he know that Adam had kissed him because he'd wanted to kiss him, not because he was sad or because he missed the others.

"Fuck yeah you can kiss on a roller coaster. There's a damn incline that seems to take forever to go up." Ronan was pretty sure that you could kiss on a roller coaster. He hadn't ever tried it, but he was more than willing to give it a shot.

Except that he then went and put his foot in his mouth, destroying the moment, self destructing in a way that was classic Ronan. He wasn't doing it to destroy anything. He was doing it because he needed Adam to want him. He needed Adam to want to kiss him, rather than simply wanting to comfort him, or even worse, wanting someone else.

"Not in public, Parrish," Ronan tossed back then stormed after him, reaching out to grab Adam's arm.

He felt that hand on his arm and started to shake it off but then thought better of it because it was Ronan Lynch and when Ronan wanted something, he took it. Adam whirled around to glare at him. Yes, he was pissed off. He was hurt. He was rethinking everything he had done up there and was starting to really regret it. Not because of the act itself, but because Ronan thought he was wishing it was Blue.

Fuck. That.

"Let go." He said plainly. "I'm going back to the room." Fairs were stupid, frivolous events anyway. Adam should have known that he and Ronan couldn't get through on without exploding all over each other. He wasn't eating anymore fried foods. And he was definitely not getting on a damn roller coaster.

Oh Ronan knew he was pissed off. That much was obvious. He also knew that Adam didn't get pissed off often.

Use your words, Adam. Ronan can't read minds, though he has figured out what Adam is pissed off about.

"No. Screw that. We're at the fucking fair and we're going to have a good damn time." He wasn't letting go of Adam's arm either.

"I'm not a god damn mind reader, Adam."

Adam stood there staring hard at Ronan and trying to figure out what exactly to say to Ronan to not embarrass himself any further. He couldn't really think of anything that wasn't embarrassing. And he sucked at saying what was on his mind where relationships were concerned. But Ronan was right. He was not a mind reader.

"Why'd you have to ruin it? I mean I know it was bad timing. B-... but why ruin it?" Because yes, he should have waited for a better moment and the fair worker's 'lovebirds' comment had thrown a wet blanket on it but Ronan had gone there to Blue. "Was it that bad?"

Ronan didn't know who he was worried about being embarrassed in front of. As far as he was concerned, he and Adam were the only two that mattered and since Ronan was pushing him to talk he didn't think he ought to feel embarrassed by whatever he said. As far as sucking at saying what was on one's mind, it was obvious Ronan was in that club as well.

"Oh Christ," Ronan started. See the above disclaimer about sucking at saying what was on one's mind. "For once in my damn life I wasn't trying to ruin shit. I was trying to figure out where the hell your mind is with this whole damn thing." He shook his head a little, jaw clenching. There was a part of him that didn't even want to dignify the 'bad' question with a response because he was pretty sure his near complete loss of control was evidence of how bad it wasn't.

"Yeah. I didn't notice the goddamn ferris wheel moving because it was bad." Said in a 'don't be stupid' tone of voice.

Both comments were harsh, just as Ronan always was, but they helped. Adam knew Ronan. He expected him to be this way. But Adam could be so insecure where it looked to him like Ronan wasn't. Feeling these things for Ronan was so new for him. Confusing. Ronan's reaction only added to that confusion.

"Where my mind's at? It's with you." Ronan was all he thought about when he let himself sit down and think. Sometimes all he thought about was that kiss in the Barns. And he had no clue what to do with that train of thought. "It's always with you." That was the truth of it. Since that first kiss, Ronan was his obsession, at least privately in the deep and dark recesses of his mind where no one could see.

He glared up at Ronan, still angry that he had said what he said, brought Blue up when he had. Although some of that anger had seeped out of him. Adam couldn't stay angry at Ronan for long.

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